Ramblings of a mom with TKH

No new pictures and I am too tired to search through archives tonight. I have been so tired lately (no, I am not pregnant!) that I have been contemplating going to the doctor to try to figure out what is wrong. Everytime I think about it though I think of my mom's diagnosis: TKH (three kids and a husband). That is most likely what it is!

I have been reflective today because it was 5 years ago exactly that I found out officially that I was pregnant with Deacon. That means that I have been pregnant or breastfeeding continually for 5 years! No wonder I am so exhausted! I had confirmed the pregnancy that day and then Noah and I met for a picnic and I told him we were going to have a baby! No, I didn't plan an elaborate Frances-like picnic with homemade everything. I just picked up Jimmy Johns. Even when I didn't have the TKH excuse I wasn't extremely motivated or domestic.

Why didn't I get more done before I had kids? Why didn't I get anything done when I only had 1 kid? Or even 2? It is a piece of cake to just take care of 2 kids!

Which brings me to the park story. Last week Noah and I had the kids at the park. There was a dad at the park with 2 kids. Notice he only had 2 kids. I think he was yearning to try the 3 kid scenerio because he kept trying to take over ours. But he doesn't understand the 3 kid scenerio. He kept trying to help Roman down from things. Finally he looked at me and said, "aren't you worried about him?" I paused briefly to think about that question and answered, "not particularly."

You see, I wanted to tell him that I do worry about Roman. I worry about him running out into the street. I worry about him trying to drive my car. I worry about him jumping into bodies of water. I worry about him hitting other children. But I don't worry about him falling off of playground equipment. Maybe I should. But I don't. I wanted to tell him, "listen, I have TKH. I can only worry about a certain number of things. The possibility of Roman falling off a ladder 2 feet of the ground is not going to make the list for a really long time."

Then he informed me that Deacon's shoelace was untied. So like any good mom would I faked a, "oh my, thanks for telling me. Sweetie, come over here right now so mommy can tie your shoelace. You don't want to get hurt!" Between you and me, I only worry about untied shoelaces around bikes, escalators and treadmills. I spent the rest of the time at the park with my fingers crossed hoping that Roman wouldn't dive off of anything and require an ED visit.

And that brings me to today at homeschool gym and swim. (Can I be a homeschool mom...the closer it gets the more I wonder if I am there...Noah, yeah, he could fit in, but me? I don't know. I guess I may just keep running during the class instead of rehashing the latest environmental scares and education techniques. Running benefits my family. It allows me to catch Roman when he heads for uncharted waters.)

The moms were all talking about how the world is going downhill and discussing their lead testing kits and their radon detector things and their osmosis purifiers. I bit my tongue as I remembered fondly the song from who was it? PFR? "We're all going to die. Sorry to upset you, but we're all going to die. One more thing to look forward too. Get hit by a truck while crossing the street or get salmonella from a bad piece of meat..." Then I remembered the more important words, "Do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself, each day has trouble enough of it's own." and "Cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you."