Deacon: Our Big Picture Child

Time for some updates! Deacon takes his responsibility of "oldest child" very seriously. He is brimming with information and ideas and really, really likes parties, extreme sports and being "cool".

Deke and I rode our bikes to the park the other day to play a little football. (He always thinks he can throw much further than he actually can, so it was more running than playing). Anyway, when we got there and got off our bikes he gently reminded me that I should probably take my helmet off and "just leave it by your bike like I do, mom". Poor kid has pretty uncool parents.

He really just wants to be an awesome skateboarder who makes movies. He keeps up a running monologue at all times. Yesterday we were biking and this is what he said about his future plans, "I'd really like to be one of those construction workers so that I could go on roofs. Either that or make movies. I think I will stick with making movies though, probably."

Deacon can be a little wild and get into trouble in exciting situations, but at home he really is the easiest of my kids to deal with. He is pretty happy and willing to help out and do things and works at getting everyone motivated. Berean reminds me of Deacon when he was a baby- a baby that was always willing to give me the benefit of the doubt and only cried in really important situations. And honestly, if Berean ends up like Deacon in personality, we will be lucky (though our ears may be stressed out.) Deacon holds Berean and talks to her in running monologue and even inserts jokes. It is pretty cute.

Deacon is not a big fan of Kindergarten, mostly because he would rather be playing. He is a "big picture" kid who loves being read to- fiction, nonfiction, history, geography and science. He learns really well by listening and will listen to whatever I choose to read for hours.

He is learning how to read and is doing a good job, but it is harder for him than just learning about the world. He is doing pretty well with his math, too, although he has more of an "estimator" personality who has little interest in finding out the "exact" answer. For example, a couple months ago I asked him what 5 + 6 was. He looked at the numbers for a couple seconds and responded, "I suppose it is around 12".

I guess by some, 11 is considered "around 12"

I laugh when he sits down to "work" on his "book". He doesn't color pictures or scenery. It is all diagrams, plans, and maps with plenty of arrows. Everything is done in black and he uses very minimum details to show the plans. To him the point is not to draw a person, but instead to draw a rudimentary stick figure with arrows to show what the person is doing, will be doing or should be doing. There needs to be a purpose.

I mentioned my plans for adding on to the house (someday when we have more money :) He took my ideas and ran with them. Literally ran all over the house and yard, asking me questions about why wouldn't I add on here instead of there, what will I do about this bush or that window, and how the fire hydrant will factor into all of it.

He spent 20 minutes last night discussing rocket boots, concrete skateboard parks and a ramp for his scooter.

After the discussion I told Noah that I feel a little bad that he has us as parents. We are both super practical, and although I am a dreamer- I am a dreamer with one foot firmly grounded in reality. But he sits there and tells us his plans, his dreams, and we both have to bite our tongues to keep from being overly negative.

So we are working on being supportive but making him think about things.

We started an obeying mommy jar. If I tell them to do something (a very direct command that needs immediate attention) and they do it right away without arguing they get a penny in their jar. After implementing this system I learned something new about Deacon that I had been wondering about: his problem is not obeying as much as it is listening. If he doesn't want to obey and he actually hears what we say he argues about it. His problem is that what I say usually goes in one ear and out the other. He goes off to get his shoes and gets distracted. He goes to get in the van and sees a bird in the tree.

Since we started the system he has been coming back to me a few seconds after I give him a command and asks for clarification or "what did you say again?"

For my part I have been trying to make eye contact when I tell him to do something and make sure he is listening and that his head isn't in the clouds.

He definitely keeps things moving around here and we love him dearly!