Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Crabby Playground Mom (that would be me)

I am not an overly anxious mom. My kid is hanging from the monkey bars screaming and I will go over to assess the situation, but I usually at least try to talk him down on his own before activating a preschool boy rescue mission. "Dude, your feet are like 12 inches off the ground. Well, maybe 18. Just drop"- that is a pretty common park statement for me.

Quite frankly, I have too many boys too close together to always be the rescuer.

Sometimes, at least, they need to assist each other or do it on their own.

Today my sister and I loaded the boys up to drive 40 minutes to the "spiderman" park. It is a huge tangle of nets, webbing, slides and tunnels. And it is pretty awesome. Of course it is geared toward kids 5 and up and they provide a "preschool play area" as well. But honestly, what 2 or 3 year old is going to want to climb across the 3 foot bridge and down the 2 foot slide when they could instead be a couple hundred feet up clutching to spiderman webs. Maybe some, but not mine.

So Karla and I took turns going up with the little ones and protecting them.

Yes, we picked the day to go when there were no less than 4 elementary aged groups there as well. The blue shirts, the purple shirts, the orange shirts and the turquoise shirts.

Lincoln was able to climb almost everything, but I was a little afraid of him getting trampled or his head stomped on by some under-observant, over-zealous tag playing 10 year old. So I followed him up there. There were a couple staff members from the other groups up there at times, but no other moms.

It is a different world up in the webs with a gaggle of elementary/preschool aged kids.

For the most part the kids were actually really pretty respectful of each other and watched out for younger kids. But some were just obnoxious.

I ran into this punk 6 year old a couple of times. He would get onto the slide, put his feet on the slide in front of him, scooting an inch at a time. He would tell the people behind him in line (with a huge grin on his face) "I am slow and you need to wait until I am at the bottom and I tell you to go". And I said, "No, you need to go fast because there is a pile up on the web behind you of people waiting to get on this slide and no one is going to wait for you to inch down." Why did I say that? because I am the crabby playground mom, that's why.

Or the elementary aged girls sitting in a tube who didn't want to get out when we came along and told Deacon, Roman and I to "just crawl over us". And I said, "No. You are going to get out. I am not going to crawl over you and my boys should not have to crawl over some 11 year old girl either." Why? Because I am the crabby playground mom.

And I am ok with that.


The Clutters said...

I too believe that I will be the crabby playground mom.

Momma Bear said...

Is that what we're called? I tried desperately to get into a logical conversation last week with a 2 year old. He was ticking me off cause he kept bumping my kid off the teeter totter. I'm so with you.

Billi Jo said...

I am the crabby Park & Rec mom...It infuriates me to no end that the Daycare's and City Program Groups think they get priority at the Park & Rec activities in the area. I am certain that the other stay-at-home-moms heave a sigh of relief when they see me arrive. I am obviously the only one gutsy enough to inform the masses to move a side. I am sure the "teachers" hate me, I simply feel as tho they could organize their own functions and leave the city events for those of us who need it.

Billi Jo said...

So sorry about the rant...but it did feel good.

Lesley said...

I love reading your blog because it always makes me laugh.

Oh and about the running? I had a bit of a set back after I came home from a run awhile back and found huge, bubbly blisters on both feet. That really stunk. I waited a day for them to heal and then tried again but it caused significant pain. I haven't gone out since but it's something I WILL get out and do. Soon. Because I found that running is fun, at least when you don't get blisters. Darn shoes. I'm ordering a new pair that should be much better for my feet. :)

Rachel said...

Every playground needs a few moms like you!

Matt said...

1) I think it's funny you called the kids a gaggle - because I can't stand geese - and I think I'd feel the same way about the kids.
2) What were the responses of the kids on the slides who wouldn't go down? Did they move? If they didn't, I'd hope you found the biggest kid you could, and sent them down as fast as they could to 'clear the clog'.

The Three 22nds said...

Matt, I was the "biggest kid", so I just went down to "clear the clog".

Billi, I am so with you! groups who think they get to "control" the place or activity (especially if it is free) just because they have the most bodies, annoy me.